Nothing Never Happens
In a consistently chaotic, apocalyptic and relentless version of Earth, a delivery man just wants to do his job
Package For Jones
The blaring alarm is excruciating. Each chime evokes a choir of wailing children and there’s no end in sight. I’m still tightly grasping Sophie’s wrist as she screams and pulls. I know I can’t let go. There are about fifty of us at least in this small shop. The windows are covered by scrap metal and the only door is boarded shut.
“We have to find him, please.” Sophie begs me through her tears.
“We can’t go outside yet. But look, it’s Ronny, alright? He’s quick and crafty, I’m sure he got to shelter.” She nods, attempting to convince herself. God, I hope I’m right. The sound of an explosion briefly consumes that of the siren. Some folks begin pushing toward the door where three security officers stand their ground.
“This is still the safest place to be,” The officer in the middle explains, “You’d jeopardize all of our safety by going out that door.” The agitated crowd croaks back at the officers. The siren, the yelling, and the hard plinking on metal meld into a singular chaotic harmony. I no longer hear the words Sophie is saying or the argument by the door. I hold on tight and close my eyes, waiting for the nightmare to end.
As soon as the siren stops, I release my grip and Sophie slides her hand out. She runs to the door behind a large crowd and shoves her way through. I sigh and follow, without pushing anyone. As I walk outside, I’m briefly blinded by the hot sun and then everything starts to clear up in front of me. The first thing I notice are the bodies. I can see six, and others are already running to check their pulses. I look around to see Sophie not too far in the distance, kneeling over one of the corpses with her head down.
I listen to her cries as I stare into the lifeless eyes of my best friend. There’s a sharp rock jutting out of the back of his neck and he’s sprawled out on the ground in a pile of his blood. I do not shed a tear or look away. I just stand there. Behind them both.
“Oh,” I say out loud. Sophie releases another cry and puts her arms around his body. I place a hand on her shoulder and continue looking into his eyes. At any other point in time they were the most emotive eyes I’d ever seen. Ronny could never lie, he wore his emotions on his face. Now, there’s nothing. No final message. No lasting feeling.
Stretchers arrive for the survivors. As I take a longer look at my surroundings, I see the sharp black juts of meteor everywhere. Some chunks as large as livestock litter the grassy field. I stand with Sophie as they put a green cover over his body and take him away.
“Why?” She cries softly. I don’t have an answer. She’s not looking for any. “Can you get my mom?” She asks me. I nod, assuringly and start rushing toward Sophie’s family home. I burst in without warning, shocking her mother and the others who’d been sheltering in the house.
“Winston? What’s happened? Where is Sophie?”
I grit my teeth. “She’s okay. Ronny got… A meteor hit him. He’s dead.”
“No.” Kathy drops her open book and rushes out the door to go find her daughter. A man and his two kids are staring at me from the kitchen. The kids are no older than ten and the taller one looks far more frightened than the other. I smile awkwardly and even wave. Nobody waves back. I watch Kathy run to Sophie and know she won’t be alone. Then, I do what I always do. I make my way to work.
*
“Uh yeah, a neighbor… Not a particularly close one, but we said hello every day. His entire house collapsed on top of him. What about you? Did you lose anyone?” Candy tightens her boots on the old schoolhouse chair.
“Ronny.” I respond quickly.
“Ronny, like your friend Ronny?” When I hear the word friend, I grin for a moment only for it to collapse into an everlasting scowl.
“My best friend. Known each other since we were eight.”
“Christ, Winston, what the hell are you doing here?”
“What do you mean?”
“Your best friend died this morning.” Her eyes water up and her hands dance alongside her words. I shrug and close my locker.
“He was hit by a meteor. A small piece of rock lodged in his neck. Probably one of the better ways to go, right? It’s quick, the body’s intact, and you could never see it coming.”
“Even so…”
“Come on, Candy. Lyle might test his new crossbow on us if we’re late again.”
We walk quickly toward the stairway and make our way up to the management office. Everyone is already waiting. Lyle sits with his elbows on the desk while his head leans on his clasped hands. In the back corner, the old and gruff Earl waits impatiently. Austen is on the floor with what I am just now noticing is a young boy with pointy brown hair and the face of a doe. I glance confusingly at Lyle who takes a deep breath before announcing,
“Thank you all for being here. I know today has already posed significant challenges.” His voice is the usual calm and robotic. It is particularly off putting today. “This newest mission is urgent and top secret. You will be delivering a package to an unmapped settlement. You are not to open the package. The only person you give the package to is the recipient, a guy named Stromulus Jones.” My stomach clenches. Jones. The name hits like a rock. I cover my mouth. Lyle continues. ”As for roles, Candy is leading the mission. Winston and Earl will protect the party. Austen is there to map out the area. Louis here will be your personal guide into the wilderness.”
There’s an awkward silence in the room as we try to come to terms with that explanation.
“Should a… Child really be a part of this?” I ask Lyle who remains entirely still. Louis stands up and answers for himself.
“I grew up out there. I know how the animals work, the monsters too. I know which berry tastes good and which one will kill ya slow. I’m not the one you should be worried about.” The kid asserts confidently to a stunned room. I glance at Lyle who refuses to make eye contact with me.
“When do we leave?” I ask the crowd. As expected, Lyle is the one to respond.
“Two hours. Get everything you need and meet back here.” He taps the back of his crossbow which leans against the wall. The group scatters leaving me alone in the management office. There’s a small window on the far side with the view of a brick wall one building over. Still, natural light floods this room. I breathe in the scent of freshly painted wood. I prepare to leave when something catches the corner of my eye. The brown package by the wall, the one we’re delivering to Jones: Did it just flicker?
Strange Place For a Beach
The glaring sun beats down on us. The fabric of my shirt feels like it’s melding with my skin, excreting immense amounts of sweat. I play with a small rock in my pocket and course it between my fingers.
“So before the Flood, Campus was a place where people came from all over the world and studied… anything?” Louis is intrigued and walks quickly to keep up.
“Pretty much.” I reply, half listening to the kid.
“Like the library?”
“Like a library and a school and also a place to hang, and you had to pay a lot of money to go there. And you would live there too, sometimes.”
“You had to pay to learn?”
“Yeah, well, at that level anyway. It was a privilege in my time, but it was also a status… A title to tell the higher paying jobs that you’ve mastered something.”
“But if you need the status for the jobs, how do you get the money for studying?” Nobody has a response and the crowd falls unnervingly silent. The tall grass whips against Louis’ legs as he trudges through. Candy walks next to him and I’m right behind. “Is Candy your real name?” Louis asks thoughtfully as if he’d been considering it for a while.
“It’s short for Candrew.”
I snort and cough out the rest of my laugh while Louis takes a moment to realize it’s a joke.
“I think Candy is a cool name,” Louis continues as if it was a regular conversation. “You’re named after something nice. My name doesn’t mean anything.”
“Of course it does.” Austen scurries to catch up. “Did your parents pick the name?”
“My older brother.” Louis looks up into her big friendly eyes. “But he’s gone now.”
“Your name doesn’t have to derive meaning from the past. Your name represents who you are. You are Louis: a guiding light in a dark world.”
“Hey shush for a sec,” Candy turns and rubs sweat off her brow, “Austen, is this right?”
“Hmm. The shoreline moved up but look, there’s the Skyscraper.” Austen points beyond the coast to the top floor of a tall thin building peaking through the daunting calm ocean.
“What was the Skyscraper used for?” Louis asks me softly.
“I don’t know. Could be lots of things. There were hundreds of them in each city.”
“People lived there?”
“Maybe.”
“Wow.”
“For a Guide you ask a lot of questions.” Candy remarks. Louis nods and looks away to roll his eyes.
“This world is all I know. I can only experience what it was through your tales.”
“Back then, the only thing that mattered was how much money your parents had. I actually like it better now. It’s fairer. Everyone gets dealt from the same shitty deck.” I listen to small waves crash upon the concrete shore. Finally, Candy changes the subject. “Austen, remind us of the next step?”
“Straight west from the Skyscraper and we’ll get to the Marshlands before sundown.”
“Right. We’ll be exhausted so that’s good timing.” Candy reassures herself. Seagulls squawks pierce through the thick sea air. The odor is an uncomfortable mixture of ocean and ash. It causes a slight reaction in my stomach that I’m able to hold down.
“They have beds in the Marshlands?” Earl asks almost too quietly for anyone to hear him. Candy responds,
“They have tents. It’ll be fine, it’s just for one night.”
Earl sighs and paces around in a circle, head cradled in his hands. He mumbles about hating kids or something and walks ahead, leading the group west. We trail behind him, one at a time with at least ten feet of space in between us. I enjoy the feel of the rough wind, but my teeth start chattering. I stop to pull a jacket from my bag. During that time, Austen catches up to me.
“The Marshlanders speak a different version of English. Learning the standard language doesn’t help with dialects.”
“Yeah, Austen. Crazy stuff.”
She keeps going anyway.
“I’m getting better at speaking with a Marshlander accent but… they’d probably lynch me if they heard it. For now, I’m keeping it to myself. Do you know any other languages besides our dialectical English, Winston?”
“No, I can’t say I do.”
“How about you, Candy–?”
“Would you shut the hell up?” Earl interrupts without turning around. “Talking about dialects. That ain’t our world anymore.” He mumbles loudly and aggressively. “Some of us are trying to do our job.” He taps his rifle with an aura of expected confidence. Louis shrugs and I pat him on the shoulder.
“We’re just making conversation, Earl. You don’t have to participate.” Candy explains despite not contributing a word to that particular conversation. I look up to be immediately blinded by the sun directly above me. The package that we’re delivering is strapped to Candy like a backpack and I glance at it often, wondering if I might see something odd. As far as I can tell, it’s just a box. “Austen, how are we doing on time?”
We all jump into action at the sound of galloping horses. I pull out my pistol and aim it south where I hear it getting louder. A short wall of dirt and dust forms ahead of the dozen horses riding right up to us. There is a rider on each horse and each one holds a weapon. As they draw closer and encircle us, I watch Earl lower his gun and begin to surrender. I’m about to yell at him when Candy says,
“You do it too. I’ll talk to them.” I sigh and lower my pistol, still holding it ready to use if anything goes awry. Austen has her arms around Louis who is just trying to see over her. She gives me a nod as she puts her arms in the air. The horsemen are all dressed in red, some in dress shirts, others jackets and track pants. All kinds of shades of red, but only red, even down to their shoes. I notice one pair of badly painted sneakers locked into a horses’ saddle.
“You folks lost?” The woman leading the pack asks in a way that I can’t tell is threatening or accommodating.
“We’re a package delivery squad from Campus, currently en route to the Marshlands.” Candy turns around so they can see the package on her back and points to it with her thumbs. I watch the varied reactions of the riders to the names of those places. Some nod while others sneer. The leader whistles loudly and everyone goes quiet.
“Campus, eh? Must be nice. Well, you’re damn near the border of Deep Red.”
“It’s a public trade route, ma’am.” Candy asserts.
“Oh, I know. Just make sure you stay on it. Ain’t no law in the Deep Red.” The horse riders all chant and cheer. Some of them excitedly grunt.
“Is the whole wearing red thing a law for you guys, or just your aesthetic?” I ask, genuinely curious. Earl elbows me in the stomach and I want to eat my words. Thankfully, the leader laughs it off. The other eleven horseback riders follow suit.
“You’re funny. You should come by Dawn City some time. If you can handle it.” She whistles again, twice this time, and the group of horses roll out.
“I think I’m good.” I reply to the air. Candy smirks and jabs me lightly on the shoulder. A much more comfortable punishment than Earl’s. My stomach is still reeling from that one.
“Uh–” Austen coughs and focuses on her map. “There’s time for a fifteen minute break and a big rock up ahead we can sit on.” I nod and listen for Earl’s pissed murmuring.
I bite into my chicken sandwich and savor the dry meat wrapped in bread. Everyone else is doing the same. None of us had eaten today. Even Earl is quietly sitting on the big rock, blocking light from the sun and listening to the bugs sing. I take a sip from my water bottle and embrace the warm air like a hug. Candy had placed the package down beside her and I stared at it, wondering if I might see it flicker again. Or if that was just in my head. As I slowly rotate to see the rest of the group, I see Austen packing up and getting ready to go. Earl and I are the last ones to finish eating, but we’re still on time.
I’m ready to collapse to the ground by the time we finally make it over the final hill and can see the colony of tents, RVs, and makeshift homes stretching over miles of swamp. It’s about what I imagined. Louis is holding his hand to his chest and saying something under his breath. It sounds like a prayer.
“You alright?” I ask him. He stops and puts his hands in his pockets. Louis gives me an uncertain nod and I decide not to pry any further. We walk down the wet grassy hill to the entrance. A small, unintimidating guard greets us behind a rather pathetic rope.
“Halt!” He exclaims excitedly. “Identify!” He shouts as shines a light directly in my face.
“Campus Delivery Team Two.” Candy responds, her words slurring off her tired breath.
“Access Code?”
“Hip Hop Legend J-Parm Found Dead in Car,” Candy answers, struggling to even get the words out.
“Welcome to the Marshlands.”
I look at Candy, confused but can see she’s in no position to explain. Austen, however, speaks as if she’s read my mind.
“Each week the Marshlands radio out a headline code. Our decoders crack it and pass it to the team leader—only to be spoken at the gate.” Austen has the largest smile across her face as she describes the code process gleefully.
“You decode it then?” I ask to fill the dead air. A woman draped in vines takes us to our tents.
“My partner, Dana, is the Chief Campus Codebreaker. She created the best ones herself.” She explains, spit shooting from her excited mouth. I’m not entirely sure why but this information came as a bit of a shock to me. I suppose I expected her to be single.
The night encroaches and wind rustles the tall tree leaves. I set up the tent that I’ll be sharing with Earl and Louis, and drape a sweatshirt over my backpack to make a pillow. I hear some commotion and peep my head outside through the tent.
“Ay, ay, enchyada dol layt!” A muddy man points toward Louis. He seems excited and is motioning for his friends to come see.
“Layt dalanas, ay? Mahsh.” A squeaky voiced shadow mumbles from behind him.
“What are they saying?” Earl asks Louis, more irritated than curious.
“Choko dol mahsh, Jordan. Choko miyarei.” Louis speaks with conviction, like a completely different person in the Marsh language. I could even mistake him for an adult if I close my eyes. Earl repeats his question once again, his face turning red and ears about to pop with steam.
“What the hell are you saying?”
“They weren’t expecting to see me.” Louis says calmly, returning to his young, sweet voice. “I don’t belong here.” He concludes and I step aside to let him climb into the tent and fall asleep in the clothes he was wearing all day.
“Fucking rats.” Earl sneers at the Marshlanders who are mumbling to themselves in a group of six. I place my hand on Earl’s shoulder and he shoves away from me. He shakes his head and looks directly into my eyes. There’s a deep longing in his narrow scowl, one that I couldn’t see from afar. It’s like he’s staring beyond me. Like he’s waiting for someone better. Then he simply blinks a couple of times, turns around, and prepares himself for bed. I look across the path to see the lights already out in Candy and Austen’s tent. I should probably get some sleep. Busy day tomorrow.
Invasion on the Beltway
Our route from the Marshlands to Cleveland has us navigating an invisible maze. The switchbacks and zigzagging certainly irritates me, but I’ve long accepted it. All day, on the other hand,
“You’re positive this is the fastest way?” Earl asks Austen for the fourth time, prompting us all to roll our eyes.
“It’s the only way. If we stray off the Marshlanders’ path, we could get swept up in the tide.” Austen explains, somehow, not even really annoyed.
“I’m sure you’d make for some great shark meat, Earl, if you want to give it a go.” Candy sneers. I chuckle a bit before retreating at the sight of Earl’s haunting eyes and his towering shadow. I wipe the smile off my face and look down at the dirt as I follow in Austen’s footsteps. I can overhear a conversation she’s having with Louis about her maps. She opens up her note book to show him something.
“So you’re mapping out a railway?” He has a sheepish grin across his face that I’m not sure I’ve seen before.
“Yup. Imagine this entire trip taking two hours, and all you have to do is sit.” She closes her notebook and puts it back in her pack. I smile at the notion and think of all the times I took public transportation for granted. I would kill for a taxi.
Dark clouds block the sun today, but Austen insists rain would be the least of our worries. As we arrive at the top of the hill, it’s clear why. An ocean is roaring through the valley about ten miles out. Only a narrow path occasionally soaked in shallow water remains going anywhere resembling west.
“Okay, I see now.” Earl delivers a defeated grunt and stands straight in his place in line. “Sorry, I could have been more patient.” He admits freely to a satisfied look from the group.
“Yeah?” Candy snarks, baiting an unnecessary argument.
“It’s fine.” Austen puts an end to that possibility. “Just keep following behind me. Single file and we won’t drown.” As we continue our march drenched in sweat, I notice the package on Candy’s back flickering aggressively. I stop in place, causing Earl to walk into me.
“What the hell?” Halfway through saying it, he redirects his confusion from me to the package that appears to be disappearing from reality. Candy slaps her back, writhing in discomfort as it rapidly reappears on her back like a spider. She manages to slip off the shoulder straps and the package sits in front of me and Earl. We watch in awe as it twitches like a kid on meth.
“Incredible…” Austen acknowledged, pushing Candy to the side to get a better view. Louis is standing behind with a fearful look when I meet his eyes. “Some sort of quantum entity…” She reaches out to touch it. I stop Earl from reaching for his rifle with a hand on his shoulder. The flickering slows down. It halts. We all do when we hear the sound. It’s like a giant metal box being slid along cement. I look up to see the giant slab that is the bottom of an alien spaceship. The massive floating spacecraft flashes a litany of pink and red lights upon our location.
“Shit.” Candy announces what we’re all thinking. The laser lights move around like a disco ball tagging three planes flying in. The marked planes combust simultaneously, leaving only ash and dust to float away in the wind.
“What the hell do we do!?” Earl’s screeches escape him as he stares up into the eye of the giant floating saucer. I shake my head in disbelief and look toward Candy for some kind of answer. Her mask is slipping and I watch her heightened scowl morph back into a natural, primal, scared young woman with nowhere to run.
I close my ears at the sound of gunfire. When I finally look up after what felt like thirty minutes but must have been five seconds, Earl’s entire frail body is shaking as his rifle points up into the sky, four bullet casings on the concrete beneath him. Candy closes her eyes, anticipating the obvious outcome.
A thin green laser from the alien ship vaporizes Earl into a pile of ash that dissipates quickly in the wind. I blink several times, attempting to process while Candy tackles me to the ground. With my head against the pavement, I see Austen follow suit and pull Louis down as the UFO does another laser sweep. The red laser performs a grid search on the street below. It begins on the spot where Earl had previously existed, and then expands rapidly. There’s probably only a few minutes before they locate us. We’d simply run, but a green laser field has been activated draping below the perimeter of the entire ship. Same color of laser that shut Earl up forever.
So this is how it ends.
I’m not mad or disappointed. Maybe a little sardonic. But I’m as ready as I’m gonna be.
THUD
The saucer’s lasers turn off instantly revealing a shiny, ripped flying man holding the entire spaceship up with two hands and pushing it back into the sky. I can hear him scream in pain as he uses all his force to shove the cruiser as hard as he can into space. I place my hand over my forehead to block out the clouded sunlight and shudder in disbelief. The man’s gold cape waives majestically while floating down to the ground. Louis pushes through Austen to pull himself up and point excitedly at the man outfitted in white and gold lands. There’s a circle of dust responding to his landing that he walked out of to greet us. I notice a giant ‘O’ plastered on his chest. Austen clearly notices it too.
“You’re… you’re the Olympian?” Austen asks in disbelief. The tall, muscular, blonde haired man nods slyly.
“Who is—” I begin but am quickly interrupted by Louis, who anticipates my question.
“World’s strongest superhero.” He exclaims, hardly believing his own words.
I look at him blankly with a different kind of disbelief. We don’t speak for a moment. Ash swirls where Earl stood. Candy lets out a laugh, quick and sharp—almost a gasp.
“It’s an honor to meet you, sir,” Austen says, her voice cracking. “Thank you for saving our lives.”
“The honor, young lady, is mine— Ohhhh no.” He interrupts himself as the Invader spaceship returns to the atmosphere. The soundwave from his launch shoots sand into my mouth and I spend the next few seconds spitting and drinking water while Candy grabs Earl’s rifle from the ground.
“Let’s go, let’s get the fuck out of here, come on.”
Austen grabs the now solid package off the floor and begins to run, taking the lead on the wet path. We follow Austen carefully but quickly without complaint and all collapse in a grassy field a few miles away that quickly becomes an island in the middle of endless sea. We lay still for a few seconds, unsure whether to laugh, cry, or just keep breathing. Bits of Earl’s ash are still caught in my boots. But nobody says his name—not yet.
“So there are like… more superheroes?” I ask the crowd after catching my breath. Louis is the only one sitting up and he responds,
“Yup, there’s Rooster Dude, King, Spotlight. I don’t know if Gas Mask Gary is evil still, I think they might be working with the league.”
“The league?” Candy interjects. She’s cackling contagiously.
“You’re making those up.” I assert. “Do they all fly?” I begin to laugh too as I see a smile grow on Louis’ generally dreary face.
“No, heh, well one of them kinda glides I guess–”
“Earl had a daughter. She’ll be alone now, right?” Austen’s question stuns the three of us into an uncomfortable, but familiar silence. Her eyes don’t just look tired, they look damaged. Like there’s a brand new broken person looking through them. The laughter is sucked out like air flattened out of a plastic bag. The isolation of our land mass surrounded by a moving sea becomes strikingly resonant. Small waves crash against our rocky path. A layer right at our feet is now covered in water, filling into my socks. A flock of birds sing on a nearby tree to another group on an old, half fallen power line.
“Campus will look out for her.” Candy has the guts to say something, and continues, “and she’s a strong kid, she’ll be fine.”
Something about the way she says that, or maybe the words themselves sends a shiver down my spine. It’s a lie and she’s not even really trying to hide it. Regardless, Austen seemingly accepts it.
“We should keep going.” She wipes the wet dirt off her pants best she can and stands up. “We should at least get to Pittsburg before sundown. Candy pushes herself up and nods in agreement. Austen helps Louis stand and I take a few seconds, feeling dizzy when I’m on my knees.
“You good?” Candy asks, already starting to walk the path.
“I’m great.” I respond and follow behind. The birds sing the same tired song as we leave them behind.
Just Past the Nightmare Tunnel
“I just wish he didn’t shoot at it.” Austen’s curly brown hair is half lit in the moonlight.
“I know. I do too.” I take a seat on the same log as her by the lake. Neither of us can sleep. Austen can’t stop thinking about Earl and the way he died and it’s keeping her up. I just can’t sleep, I don’t really have a reason. There are crickets hidden somewhere in the long grass but it is impossible to track exactly where.
“Do you ever think we could be doing more, Winston?”
“What do you mean?”
“We’re delivering that package.” Her eyes wander over to the box sitting comfortably and entirely still beside our campsite. Candy’s snores get louder as Austen continues her thought, “We don’t even know what’s inside. Or who we’re delivering it to.” She frustratingly slaps her hand against her head. I wince at the final sentence.
“And Earl…”
“What did you mean back when you said the package was ‘quantum’?” It had been on my mind anyway so it’s a perfect way to change the subject.
“Oh,” I watch as her demeanor changes and a tinge of excitement begins to fill the void on her face. “Right, well I don’t know much about quantum physics, but essentially, there are strings in our world other than time and space that function alongside them. That package is tapped into something that allows it to disappear to perhaps another space in our world, another time in our world, or an entirely different universe. Maybe it goes into a pocket dimension.”
“A pocket dimension?” I try to understand, “You’re saying it doesn’t… vanish when it’s doing that, it’s going somewhere, for a moment?”
“Somewhere? Sure. But that could mean another country, another planet, a parallel universe, five million years ago. This is where our collective knowledge on physics hits a bit of a brick wall.”
“So what could be inside that box? It seemed like it was reacting to the Invaders, or maybe warning us about them? Do you think there’s some sort of alien in there?”
“Could be. But if we are dealing with quantum science, one thing I can tell you for sure is not to open that box. The act of observation itself will alter whatever’s inside and I don’t particularly want to learn the ramifications of that.”
“That’s… Wow.” I feel a wave of fatigue hit me and balance myself on the log. “I think I need to go to bed.”
“I keep hearing him scream… He was right next to me. Earl was just a delivery man, he wasn’t trying to die on the mission.”
“We’re almost never trying to die, Austen. But it happens to all of us. Literally every single one of us. It’ll happen to me, to you, to Candy, to… But you keep living until then. You do your goddamn best. At that point, you’re already doing better than most.”
“You ever think we’re in hell? Being punished day after day after day.”
“Nah, I doubt it. My mom wouldn’t be here. Kids wouldn’t be here. I think the world just really fucking sucks, and it’s our job to walk through it anyway.”
“That’s a depressing conclusion.”
“Maybe we need the struggle. Maybe it’s making us stronger.”
“Stronger for what?”
I have no answer. I’m not even really sure what we’re talking about. I just sigh and listen to the still water of the lake and make my way back up to the campsite. I still can’t fall asleep.
*
“I don’t know for sure, I’ve never been this far out, but I’ll read you all the information I have. Hold on.” Austen reaches inside her backpack, grabs her purple notebook and flips through it. “Ah, yes. The Fort Pitt Tunnel in Pittsburgh is the only way north for hundreds of miles that isn’t blocked off or unusable. Construction was completed in 1960… Mayor at the time was Joseph Barr… estimated to have cost $17 million and oh here we go. It is currently haunted by a group of malevolent spirits that induce your worst nightmare. You either make it out the other side or get trapped in there forever, or rather until your body dies? Notes aren’t really clear on which.”
I must have fear in my eyes because Louis pulls on my arm as a comfort.
“Okay, great.” Candy claps and glares into the large dark tunnel, old weathered, cars packed, more tightly at the entrance as they had tried to squeeze in. “So we get past the nightmare tunnel, then we’re two days out, no more crazy obstacles, right?”
“Should be a straight shot to Jones’ camp.” Austen confirms.
“Awesome, so, uh, I’ll go first, I guess.” Candy takes a deep breath and walks inside. Louis grips Austen’s hand and they walk in together. Finally, I enter the dark. The first image I see is that of my childhood home. A run-down one-story house with an unkempt lawn and peeling mint colored paint. I can smell the neighbors barbecuing and hear the laughter behind their fence. When I face the front door to my home, there’s only silence. I curse to myself and walk inside. It’s dimmer than I remember but not dark. The family photos mark the wall on the way in. I spend an extra second looking at one of me and my brother Roger as teenagers. We look so carefree and unburdened. I feel it rub off on me too. Until I remember what comes next.
Having seen zombie media in my younger days, as with everyone in my peer group, we actually held up fairly well. My house became a camp of sorts to a few friends and neighbors whose homes had been ravaged by one disaster or another. My brother and I created a barricade, dug a moat, built traps and gathered weapons to fight off the hordes that came at night. Strangely, looking at myself in that attic, laughing with the guys, I don’t think I’d ever felt so alive. I’m a ghost in the room, watching the younger version of myself in awe.
“C’mon, Ronny.” I slap his sweaty back. “Answer the question!” The two other men sipping on beers are my brother Roger and our friend Henry… Oh god…
“She’s cool, I don’t know! Fine, I guess I like her!”
“Ayyyyy,” Henry cheers, spilling his drink on the wooden floor and I watch as me and my brother join in. Ronny’s bright red cheeks blossom as he wonders,
“I mean, do you think she’s into me?”
“YES, dude!” I watch the excitement run through my veins and I can feel it in whatever version of my chest is actually present in this vision. “Trust me. Sophie likes you. Just ask her out. We could all be dead tomorrow.”
Ronny’s growing smile makes my eyes water and when I blink, my house is destroyed, and us few survivors sit in the wreckage. Dozens of dead zombies are scattered for a mile. Henry takes another look at the bite in his waist and closes his eyes.
“Just… make sure it’s quick. Please.”
I turn away at the sound of the gun firing and walk into a dusty vista in the center of a war-torn city. This place isn’t familiar to me. Suddenly, this isn’t my nightmare. I see a young Candy, alone in the middle of the street, gripping a deflated soccer ball and holding it close. As I get closer, I see she’s crying.
“I was just getting a ball.” She shrieks as my shadow towers over her. “I didn’t know…” She cries out. I turn to see a group of mostly children, laying dead in the ashy street. A tiny hand, completely severed, sits uneasily below Candy. “I wish it got me too.” She sobs into my arms and I embrace the child version of the strong woman I’ve followed all the way here. I don’t know which tears are hers and which are mine. As we break down together in our most haunting memories, darkness drowns everything and all that is left is silence.
*
Candy and I tumble out of the tunnel gasping for air. I roll onto my stomach and grab the ground like it could disappear at any moment. It isn’t until I catch my breath that I see Louis crying, kneeling over the young woman’s body.
“No.” I shake my head and feel tears running down my cheeks. “No, no, no.” I run up behind Louis and see Austen’s corpse, laid on the ground, organs ripped out and placed beside her. “What the… what the hell happened? What the hell happened!?” My rage is directed at Louis who has nothing but tears in response. As I inch closer to him, Candy grabs my shirt and pulls. She makes eye contact with me and then embraces me softly.
“They gave me a choice.” Louis begins to explain through spouts of tears. “My life or hers… She made me pick my life. She yelled at me until I did. I thought it was all part of the nightmare. I thought maybe a test. They ripped her apart in front of me. They made me watch.
“God fucking damn it!” I yell into the sky. Then I whisper under my breath. “Why her? What did she do to… WHY DID YOU DO THIS?” I shout into the dark tunnel. A single tear runs down Candy’s face, while Louis is still an active waterfall. I remove Austen’s purple notebook from her jacket pocket and begin digging with my hands. Candy holds Louis tight and assures him,
“It’s not your fault. You couldn’t have known.”
The scream I release into the dreary moonless sky is inhuman. Anger, frustration and grief swirl inside me like I’m about to explode. Candy grabs a big stick a few feet over and helps me dig Austen’s grave.
Demolished buildings, trees and stars paint the background of the stone. Candy and I wrap her body in a tarp and lower it down into the hole. We stand there, silently, as Louis writes her name neatly on one of her notebook pages and places it atop the dirt.
“I know the recipient.” I admit, loud enough for them to hear it over the bustling wind.
“Huh?” Candy asks.
“The recipient of the package— Stromulus Jones, I know him.”
A faint drizzle turns into light rain.
“How?”
“I shot his son.” I think about continuing, but allow those words to sit with Louis and Candy for a few more moments. “He was bit by a Zombie and I killed him before he could turn.”
“Zombie?” Louis asks cautiously and immediately regrets opening his mouth.
“Oh, what happened to ‘I know all the monsters out there’ huh? I thought you were supposed to be our guide. I believed your confidence back at Campus, but you don’t know anything, do you? Well here’s a lesson. There are no zombies roaming this Earth because we took care of it. We made the world ever so slightly softer for you.”
“Winston,” Candy attempts to stop me and I start walking toward the kneeling boy. He has his head to the ground and the raindrops splash off his dark brown hair.
“And all you’ve done is get her killed.” I mutter and turn my face away. Candy shoves me out of the way and puts her arm on Louis’ back. “I’m done. Bring the package to Jones, or don’t. I don’t care. I quit.” Thunder cackles over the hills behind me as I walk away. The rain has picked up and I look around for cover. There’s an old bus stop with a seat that I camp myself in and rest my head against the glass on the side. It isn’t long before Candy approaches out of the night and takes a seat next to me at the bus stop.
“You saw my memory back in the tunnel… Right? Like that was actually you in there, with me?”
“Yeah.” I respond and take a deep breath..
“I was six years old. A two ton bomb dropped on my apartment complex. Everyone I knew, my family, my friends, wiped out in a single strike. The only reason I lived was because I was getting a new soccer ball from the sports shed. The amount of times I wished I could’ve died with them, held by my mother when they all blew up. Every night I dreamt I wasn’t left behind. When the Flood came, I finally started to understand. Chaos and evil run rampant in our world. That was true long before all the crazy bullshit we deal with now. But the answer cannot be to give up. We didn’t walk all the way here for you to rot before the finish line, Winston. We have to see this through, together.”
The cold of the glass gets to my head and I sit up straight. I see Louis, keeping his distance from me, shaking in the cold. I stand up.
“I’m sorry, bud.” My eyes water up and to my shock, he embraces me with a deep hug. I hug him back, tightly.
“It’s okay. I miss her too.” Candy wraps herself around us, joining in on the hug and we wait there together until the rain has passed.
Your Package Has Been Delivered
We gaze in awe at the magnificent fortress before us. None of us had even seen anything like it. I load up my pistol and Candy pulls the straps from the package up over her shoulders. Louis leads the way down the torchlit entrance hall until we reach a metal gate ten miles high. There’s a small camera planted on the door that twitches a little when I look at it. A voice fills the chamber.
“Of course it’s you.” I recognize the raspy voice, though it sounds significantly frailer. “Give me a moment.” He says, followed by the quiet whisper of static until the metal gate opens inward. The first thing I notice are the majestic fountains lining the property. Beautifully cut grass, power washed pavement, it feels like I’ve walked into a different world. Candy takes the package off her back and places it on the picnic table that sits in front of what is presumably, Jones’ mansion. The giant dark oak doors open together and the weary old man limps outside to meet us. The three of us stand opposite to him as he examines the box intensely.
“Alright, well, what is it?” I ask, frustratedly.
“You actually didn’t open it.” The delightment in his words are juxtaposed to the veil of darkness across his face.
“What’s in the box, Jones?”
“Winston, inside that ‘box’ if you could even call it that, is a power so fantastic, we cannot even begin to comprehend it.”
“That’s the vaguest shit I’ve ever heard.” Candy calls out. Jones gives her an odd look like he doesn’t even realize she’s there and then returns to meet my gaze.
“Twenty-five years ago, Winston, before you and I ever knew each other, this package was delivered to my home. It had no writing except my name and no way of knowing where it came from. My wife thought we should call the police but I… I guess my curiosity beat me that day. When I opened it, I understood that I was presented with a choice. No, not a choice– it was like reality was a ball of clay and I could mold it however I wanted. That’s how it felt, that’s the only way I can describe it. You see, most individuals have approximately one thing that we are confident would change our lives for the better dramatically. Be it the love of another, money and power, or even the feeling of calm. We convince ourselves that if we had just this one thing, no matter how big or small, everything else would fall into place. We’re only one wall behind our own paradise. The mind is funny like that, the way it will focus. It forcefully forgets and gleefully leads you down this path, over and over again. And every time, it’s a lie.
For me, it was my son. Where I began, my eight year old boy died of heart cancer. An inexplicable tragedy. A parent should never have to feel that, the loss of a child. Not that losing parents is ever easy but it’s… natural. It’s the way it should go. So when I opened that box, I wished for a world where my son was still with us. And, I got this one.”
“What the…” I begin and am cut off by Candy, stepping forward angrier than I’ve ever seen her.
“So this whole world is your fault? The chaos, the terror, the death, it was because you wanted something. And fuck everybody else right?”
“That’s right.” There’s a stillness in the air before he continues. I’m entirely speechless. “I made a selfish choice with power I couldn’t begin to understand. A choice which would ultimately cause my son more suffering than I could have ever imagined. And I don’t blame you for what you had to do, Winston. I did, once, a lesser version of me did, and I suffered. I will never feel deeper regret than from that day the box arrived. But I think that’s why it’s found me now, again, after all these years. Because I have to make it right. I have to set things back, fix our world and undo my mistakes.”
“What do you mean it found you?” Louis’ voice is a beacon in the dark.
“I didn’t ask anyone to deliver this package to me. It wasn’t a request. It sent you on this path, here to me. It wants balance. It yearns for rectification. Can’t you feel it? I have to do this.”
“Wait!” I yell, causing him to stand in place. “I don’t think that’s the answer.”
“My son died! And because I couldn’t accept that, our world has been ravaged by an endless series of apocalyptic disasters. The flood that killed my wife. The zombies, the raiders, the Invaders, the earthquakes, the meteors. This is our chance to set things right.”
“THAT’S NOT RIGHT!” I assert, at the top of my lungs. Candy puts her hand over her wide open mouth. Jones reaches for the package. I grab my pistol and point it at him.
“Winston… Whatever it is that you want, that barrier, that wall that you wish to break down… Using this entity, it will only unfold further. You’ll never find the peace you’re looking for.”
I think about the people I could bring back. Ronny, Austen, or even my dad. The mistakes I could undo, whether by my own hand, or by others. I sigh and shake my head.
“It’s Louis. Louis should do it.” I clock my gun and look down at the kid who’s eyes look just like the first day I met him: scared, but with an aura of confidence floating behind them. “You caused chaos because you wished for a new world, one where events played out differently and now you’re trying to do the exact same thing. You haven’t learned anything. This isn’t our world anymore, Jones. But this is Louis’ world. It’s all he’s ever known. We need to stop making the decisions. It’s gotta be him.”
“Are you insane!?” Jones doesn’t even flinch at the barrel pointed at his temple. “You want to give a child the magic monkey’s paw? After everything I just explained to you?” Candy stands behind me, and points Earl’s rifle at the old man.
“Louis opens the box.” She agrees. “That’s what it wants. That’s why it sent us here. It’s why Austen… Back down, Stromulus.”
Two guns pointed at him, Jones realizes he’s been beaten. He puts his hands in the air and shakes his head.
“Idiots.” He mutters to himself. Louis touches the box and takes another look at me.
“Are you sure?” He asks. I nod.
“I hope it’s good, kid.” Candy grins and pats him on the back. Louis tears open the cardboard box and the universe blinks.
*
I feel like I’ve just woken up from a dream but I’m in the exact spot I was a second ago. Jones is still scoffing, Candy still grinning, only the box is gone. Louis stands there, smiling from ear to ear. Then the tears come rushing down his face and I embrace him. Candy does too. Listening to Jones cursing under his breath reminds me of Earl.
“What’d you do, Louis?” I ask trepidatiously. His smile returns and he wipes the tears from his bloodshot eyes. He motions for me to come with him as he walks back toward the entrance and out the gate. We leave Jones behind in his lonely compound, forever imprisoned by his sins. As we exit through the gate and the sun shines through, Louis points gleefully at his creation. A pristine, polished, fully equipped wooden train station out of a story book has planted itself outside the fortress. A slick white, skinny train sits comfortably on a newly formed rail stretching into the horizon.
“I based it on Austen’s map. Now we can see each other quickly, no matter where we are! Sorta like before, I guess.”
“You wished for a train?” I ask, a little confused to say the least.
“Connecting every populated area in the country. It goes through oceans, underground, even around the Nightmare Tunnel so nobody ever has to deal with that again. And it’s free for everyone!”
“Well, that sure as hell isn’t like before…” I marvel at the words etched into the train cars:
Austen & Earl’s High Speed Rail
“It’s beautiful.” Candy hugs Louis tight. The three of us are grinning ear to ear as the automatic door opens and we enter the train. There’s hundreds of identical seats in the car we’re in alone. Candy and I sit next to each other in a double seat and Louis jumps in the pair behind us. An automated voice as joyfully as a robot can sound says,
“Enroute to Campus. Next stop: Pittsburgh”
“Ronny would have loved this. Oh man, Deep Red’s probably losing their minds if they’ve got tracks running through their land.” I remark as the train takes off like a rocket.
“Wait, shit, do you think people got crushed by the forming railroads?” Candy asks nervously. I peak over at Louis who is falling asleep and reply,
“I don’t know if we did the right thing.” I completely ignore her question and answer my own. “But it felt right. It feels right. This feels right.” I barely recognize my own voice. Candy rests her head on my shoulder and smiles affirmatively.
“I think this is as good as it gets.”